Copyright © 2018 Ty Grogan Ministries
Yesterday marked five years since Taylor and I got engaged. It seems like yesterday, but we will have been married for four years this December and we have a son! Our engagement involved her whole family—setting up a picnic on the beach and all of that jazz. And, obviously she said yes! I didn’t know it at the time, but God had more planned in this engagement that I knew at the time.
Rewind to the fall of 2009. I had graduated high school a few months prior and entered into Lander University as a political science major. Taylor and I met in the cafeteria and started dating shortly after. All of her friends labeled me as a nerd, but at the end of the day, the nerd won! In November of 2009, I was given some news that would change my life forever.
My dad had been diagnosed with stage four bladder cancer. I was devastated and so was everyone else who looked up to my father. Never would I have imagined that I would be given that news when I went home to visit my parents. After hearing the news, fear, anxiety, and anger set in. But, I had someone by my side to help me cope—Taylor!
In the spring of 2010 my dad had surgery to remove his bladder and I developed medical issues of my own. I would have my gall bladder removed in the summer of 2010. Fast forward to early 2011 and I recall talking to my dad about Taylor. I sat beside him as he laid in the bed and I said “Dad, I think she’s the one. I’m going to ask her to marry me!” He looked at me, smiled, and told me he was proud of me. He loved “tater-bug” as he called her and thought she was an excellent choice to serve as my help meet.
"And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him." Genesis 2:18
June 14, 2011, while we were on vacation at Fripp, I asked Taylor to marry me. July 15, 2011, my father lost his battle with cancer. That is a night that I will never forget.
July 15, 2011, I was sitting in our living room watching the Braves play. They won their 10,000th career game that night. Hospice had come out earlier in the day and told us that dad would probably live through the weekend, but not much longer than that.
As I watched the Braves play, I could hear a change in my dad’s breathing. My mom, brother, and I all looked at each other and we knew something wasn’t right. We gathered around my dad’s bed, awaiting the hospice nurse. We knew this was the end. As he lay there taking his final breaths, we each had a moment to share our last words with him. I leaned in and whispered in his ear “Thank you for being the best dad ever. It’s OK now, you can go home. I love you!” and I kissed him on his forehead. Moments later, I witnessed my dad’s last breath.
I remember running to my bedroom, screaming in anger, and I called Taylor yelling at her “He’s gone! He’s gone!” Taylor, being the comforter that she is, offered me reassurance in the light of my father’s death.
I write this post, first as a remembrance of Taylor and I’s engagement five years ago. Secondly, I write it as a remembrance of my father, who passed away five years ago this coming July. Lastly, however, I write this as a reminder and encouragement to you that God’s timing is always perfect. No matter what comes our way, whether it’s good or bad, His timing is always perfect. He sent me a strong woman to be by my side through thick and thin. He allowed me to be the son of an amazing father, who taught me so many invaluable lessons and whom showered me with tough love. He also allowed my father to find hope in Jesus while battling cancer, assuring his salvation, that I will see him in Heaven again someday.
We must remember that this life is not ours to live by ourselves, but to live it for God and His plans. When praying to God about our needs, we will receive one of three answers: Yes, No, or Wait. Many, including myself, struggle with that last answer—wait.
But we must remember, God’s timing is always perfect.
He said to them: “It is not for you to know the times or dates the Father has set by his own authority." Acts 1:7
So, if you’re going through a tough time right now and God is telling you “no” or “wait”, know that there is better things waiting for you.
Until next time…
Ty is the associate pastor at Oak Pointe Church. He and his wife, Taylor, have a son, Peyton, and they call South Carolina home.